I Smile, I Grin, When the Girl with the Touch of Sin Walks In

So the thing that I couldn't talk about is still something that I can't talk about but it is GOOD and something GOOD came out of it!

So we're HAPPY!


Oh wait, that's not happy. That's frustration and puzzlement. Sometimes I get confused. AND THEN I GET FURIOUS!


THAT'S HAPPY!

That's also a terrible picture of me, but a damn good one of the bird. My camera is still broken, can you tell? These pictures are stock Jessica photos. That bird was heavy and had the sharpest claws. And yet he was obviously something of a delight!

I'm trying to be proud and happy about it, but that's hard for me. It still feels like things aren't happening enough, and now, and I want something to do nooowwwwwwww. But I'll start rehearsals for Twelfth Night with Humber River soon.

Whenever something kind of cool happens for me in the industry it feels like a victory for the underdog everywhere. It reminds me that things can really happen if you work hard, even though it takes so much rejection to get there. But the rejection is constant! Like I have something cool that is going to happen, and then I get rejected from some non-paying, one day affair that I didn't even audition for, and I still feel bad!

And then I get sad.


Oh why oh why must I have all the emotions at once?

But yay! Really!